Sex, Drugs and Sausage Rolls

vvant:

if ur gonna be a producer and ur thinking about having a dog die in ur movie, u need to not be a producer

(via orgasmic-humor)

sweatrer:

ur insecure ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
i kno what for ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
ur a bitch ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

(via strvuss)

bombing:

hey sorry did i wake you? no nothings wrong listen i just called because i was making a midnight omelette and i accidentally dropped an egg and it looks just like Ben Franklin. it’s fucking weird dude you gotta check it out. the doors unlocked just let yourself in when you get here

(via failbag)

Anonymous asked: im 13 and my boyfriend wants me to spend the night what should i wear

asian: